


Numb

by Stedler2 (k9cat)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Blanket cuddles, Cold Showers, Crying, Gen, Tea, bitter sweet/ hopeful ending, fic focuses on virgil and the others helping him, hes only just mentioned here, idk if i want to write deceit, idk what else, implied trauma, mention of vomiting, so probably bad spelling and grammar too watch for, this was all writen today and tryped up, updaiting the tags, virgil did not react well to deceit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-07
Updated: 2018-02-07
Packaged: 2019-03-14 23:21:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13600593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/k9cat/pseuds/Stedler2
Summary: Virgil was sure the water had run cold by nowHe was numb,Numb and coldAnd he didn’t want to see that yellow face in his nightmaresThe Sides deal with the immediate aftermath of Deceit’s tricks.





	Numb

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, yes I'm jumping on the wagon of fics reacting to Deceit, who wouldn't?  
> It's midnight here and I wrote and typed this all up today, so there's probalbly spelling and grammar that needs fixing throughout this whole thing, let me know please where those are. 
> 
> Anywho, not much else to say, enjoy!

Virgil was sure the water had run cold by now.

 

He couldn’t feel it.

 

Well, he could feel the water yes, it hit his hair and dripped down his face and soaked his clothes. Bunnyhug and all. It was needing a wash anyways.

 

But he was numb. The dull repeating patterns of the falling water drumming on his clothes and the hard splashes halted any other sound around him. It was just enough to kept him grounded in the here and now, his breathing almost erratic if not for his counting pattern. His salty tears were hidden and mixed in with the water. You can’t see yourself cry in the shower.

 

He was numb, but also scared, and worried, anxious and he could feel his throat trying to close in tighter with each sob he swallowed, stomach turning again. It shouldn’t affect him this way. It shouldn’t, he _couldn’t_ allow it. Yet, it shook him to his core. In the heat of the moment, running on adrenaline and not letting emotions get caught up, he was able to push it back, ignore it for the time and deal with the problem even though he couldn’t identify it. But that’s him half the time. A vague feeling of unease that couldn’t be pinned down, but he also couldn’t push it down.

 

It grew stronger and Patton kept acting weirder. He didn’t have the words then to say, to ask Patton if something was wrong. It kept building up and up and up until he saw past the veil, and the lurking unease flipped to a smouldering anger that simmered deep down, making him terrified and wanting to punch him. Deceit unmasked, the slimy two-faced freak flipped his world for him. Thomas had panicked, he had panicked, and thoughts flew miles a minute. Thankfully Logan could get his words in. And Patton. Patton, the actual, real, proud padre Patton popped up and dismissed him.

 

After he had sunk down into the commons, he couldn’t hold back the turning in in his stomach, all the pushed down emotions couldn’t be held back anymore, and he made it just in time to the washroom, vomiting in to the ceramic bowl.

 

Now he was just numb. The adrenaline rush dropped, the hormone crash in full swing and he was just there, numb. The yellow stare had left him feeling creeping chills running up and down his whole spine and he couldn’t let go of the feeling of being watched. He somehow turned the water burning hot, fruitless efforts to get rid of the feeling and now he was just sitting in the shower. He didn’t know how long he was in there for. The probably cold water pouring over him, blankly looking at the white tile, fingers barely moving to his breathing pattern. He felt it, but he was numb. Then it wasn’t there at all.

 

Movement shifted in front of him, an arm reaching out to turn off the shower head, and in the sudden silence through the ringing of his ears he could hear words. True words, honest words. Mutters of affirmation and attempts of understanding. Comfort that warmed where he was frozen.

 

Then he saw blue. Splash of gray through his still tearing eyes and his breathing went out the window. His frame going impossibly stiff, yet every message was to flee, and things stalled with conflicting operations. He caught a glimpse of red. Roman. Roman was here, now in front, his boisterous voice echoing through the ringing. Roman was also here, and he knew the creative trait was a slippery slope with flattery taken at face value, but he learned quick, and would never fall for the same trick twice. He would take action against the harmful and do his best. This was not a falsehood, deception. It was the cat sweater, and the true worry that shone in Patton’s eyes. The way he halted his movements immediately after the bad reaction. Asking for permission. The _Love_. He caught his breathing again. He nodded.

 

Roman helped Patton lift him up. Towels appeared, and they dried his face and mopped up the mess of his hair, his tears were faithfully dabbed away every time they spilled on his cheeks. His soggy clothes were carefully removed, and he was gently dried, unspoken asks for every movement given permission. It was a good reminder of good touch, of something that was his, his decision, under his control. Of healthy care and affection that the others held for him and each other, the cold started to thaw under their warmth. Even with that, he could barely move, still frozen, finding himself shivering and goosebumps raising every hair on his body in a futile attempt to keep him warm. He doubted he would have had the coordination to put on the fluffy pj pants held in front of him, and the soft t-shirt slip over his head of it wasn’t for the others holding him up. He still shivered, but the tears were finally drying away. His soaking wet sweater was left with his other clothes in the tub, but his fluffy blanket appeared, and he was cocooned and lead out to the commons. Roman and Patton supporting him as they shuffled down the hall.

 

Logan was setting down a tray when they entered the room, and as much as Logan tries to be impartial, he could see the relief that flashed across his face when they turned the corner. They sunk onto the couch, Roman practically carried him down. He was still shivering despite the growing warmth around him. Patton seemed to hesitate to sit closer to him, but he was still so cold. The numbness had slowly faded away, fully revealing the bitter chill that racked his body. He could nearly feel the warmth the others radiated, and he shifted closer. He did not miss the elated smile that Patton displayed, real as ever, bright as the sun and stars sparkled in his eyes. This was Patton.

 

The sofa shifted again, Logan settling on the other side of Patton, holding a mug of tea out to him. He fumbled with his blanket for a minute before Roman helped him free his hands. Somehow his hands were steady enough to not spill the liquid, heat tingling on his cold fingers. It felt burning, but it was better than the cold.

 

It was quiet. All of them just, sitting. His shivers slowly abated as time passed. They had to talk, but it seemed no one knew what to start with. He finally sipped at his tea and could tell immediately it was a blend of camomile and that other night-relax stuff. That had practically knocked Thomas flat the first time he mixed them. Logan had taken a liking to it. Brewing a kettle of the potent sleep aid on nights when rest was fleeting. It got Lo to relax his thoughts and he liked it cause what ever it did let him fall asleep without nightmares looming on the horizon as soon as they usually do. A couple hours really makes a difference. But even with the tea, Virgil knew tonight was still going to be riddled with anxious thoughts of un-truths and fleeting images of that unnerving yellow look he did not miss.

 

He looked to Logan, who was also nursing his own mug, already half empty. The tray held two more mugs, Patton and Roman weren’t much for tea. It was a tempting idea to just chug the rest and let himself be knocked out if that meant not seeing anything in his sleep at all. But that idea was ruined, Patton leaned forward and took the two mugs, giving one to Roman. The royal did not hesitate, talking a long sip, no one wanted to dream tonight.

 

Thomas was still reeling with the new information, their conscious mind trying to make sense of the idea of the unwelcomed Side. It affected them all. And even thought they called Joan, and everything was cleared up, there was still lingering ache and they were all tired. They still didn’t know what to say. And they just kept sitting there.

 

The tea slowly took its hold over them, they want the sleep, things could be discussed in the new days light. He finally felt warm, cocooned in his blanket, heavily leaning on Patton, all the others safe, eyes drooping and head nodding in sleep. The sofa shifted, he didn’t want to move, but all that changed was someone taking the mug out of his lax hand, and more shifting and he felt a second blanket, a quilt really, cover him. He pried his eyes open enough to see Roman fixing some corners of the fabric before he himself scooted in close to his side, his warmth a strong presence beside Patton’s loving one. He glanced to Logan, the logical traits glasses were already folded on the side table, and he looked content with being tucked under Patton’s arm.

 

“I love you all.” Patton said softly, half asleep himself. They all responded with half asleep affirmations also, maybe, his dreams wouldn’t be so yellow with the others at his sides.

 

~*~ 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> I'd love to hear your thoughs and opinions on this! 
> 
> And if there's more you want to say, tumblr is k9cat =)


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